Futakoi Alternative
Run at once towards a dream
Let's meet and laugh away yesterday's troubles
When our memories were here,
even though we are deeply hurt, go straight on
I can feel it in the wind
The warm sea is shining
especially now...
surely, always, you'll be by my side
the road to the future goes on to the stars
more and more, no matter what happens
half our tears become double smiles
forever
* If you really are a man, *
* there's something I want to say. *
* It's true don't have money. *
* You're got a medium build, average height; in short an average guy, *
* and you don't even have an obedient woman. *
* Charity boy! *
* Control is just a dream. Just a dream... *
* Oh yeah. *
* Aaahh... *
* Even so, even so... *
* You will never get money from your papa. *
* You will never demand a Benz. *
* No one knows if you'll ever buy a house. *
* Don't make excuses. *
* Don't cheat on people. *
* Don't betray. *
* That is a man -- that's me. *
How's business?
Same as usual.
Kitamura Kogote's second son...
He was in the same clubs and activities as you in high school.
Kankurou?
It seems he's gotten himself a wife and has settled down.
Oh, really?
The same usual...
Leave me alone, please!
I'm going first.
Sara-chan?
Hmm?
"The same as usual, " she said...
Hmm.
What is "the same as usual"?
Although, for honor's sake, I'd say I've really matured at least a little bit.
A RECORD OF MY GROWTH
[O years old]
Futaba Rentarou.
Born and raised in Nikotama.
3 years old
Gender: Male.
Age: 21 years old.
Height: 175 cm.
Weight: 62 kg.
16 years old
Hobby: Fishing for crayfish on the Tamagawa's riverbed.
18 years old
Job: Private detective
Family: None.
Oh! Nidaime!
Morning.
Good morning, Gen-san.
Fishing for crayfish again at this time of day?
Of course! You're looking lovely as usual, twin ladies.
Yay!
To tell the truth...
Business was never good enough that I needed to hire assistants,
and as far I can remember, I've always been called Nidaime.
But...
Wah!
Nidaime!
Good morning, Nidaime.
Nidaime.
What? What?
Where did you take the twins so early in the morning, Nidaime?
Morning, twins.
Good morning!
Recently, the guy staying at my place has been coming back late,
I wonder if I can get you to investigate for me just this once?
It's expensive.
Eh...
But don't I always take care of you?
You haven't seen your calico cat since yesterday evening?
How much will it cost for you to search for it, Nidaime?
Oh, I don't need that sort of money.
We're carrying out a free campaign!
Nidaime! Morning!
Hey! Watch out for the cars!
I KNOW!
Nidaime, heads up!
Oh! Bad throw!
[Because we love this Nikotama]
Well, to put it extravagantly, there's no end to it.
The way people call me "Nidaime" is proof of the challenges I've endured.
But, before that...
There are so many things I need to say.
First is my wonderful detective business.
It's about my detective life.
YAY!
Huh?
What's "deteel hip"?
Detective!
Also, in order to understand that... a few images.
ME, 2 YEARS AGO
Image number one.
The image of a set curious twins standing at the entrance of the agency.
ME, 10 HOURS LATER
Image number two.
The image of my shock
at seeing a UFO through the hole in the agency's ceiling.
Thank you for your call.
This is the Futaba Detective Agency.
Image number three.
The day knows as "today" begins with a call from an unknown client.
UFO?
[Episode 2: No Name Day ]
That's why!
Haven't I said answering the phone the phone is my job?!
I heard it properly!
"I'II go there in an hour. I'll tell you the details then."
Well then, Shirogane Soujyu-san, what's the client's name?
I asked. He didn't say, though.
Your duties are cleaning and cooking.
As for helping out with the detective agency work...
I want to help out too! I want to! I want to!
Don't you have your girly work?!
That's why...!
I want to! I want to! I want to! I wa...
But if you did everything, I wouldn't have anything to do!!
Boss!
Which one of us should answer the phone?!
It's best to make idle conversation when the situation gets awkward like this.
Anyway, let's limit the harmless and inoffensive stories to this.
TWINS, A SLIGHTLY STRANGE STORY
Twins, a slightly strange story.
1957.
In Ohio, in America,
twins named Jim and James were born.
Four weeks after birth, they were given up for adoption.
They did not know of each other's existence for forty years.
One day, these twins unexpectedly bumper into each other.
There were some coincidental similarities.
They drove the same cars,
they married women with the same names,
their eldest sons had the same birthday,
and, Jim worked as a gynaecologist.
James... didn't.
Good day!
Hello, madam. Today we have fresh produce.
One hour has passed.
The client probably won't come.
But, that's what he said on the phone.
He said that he'd come in an hour.
Yeah.
Something must have happened.
Like the trains might have stopped,
or maybe he suddenly got sick,
something like that.
Sara-chan.
About earlier... I'm sorry about answering the phone on my own.
Nah, it's okay.
More importantly, there's s mountain of other stuff we gotta do!
That's right!
We don't know how long we'll have to deal with this tedious stuff, so let's quit wasting time and finish it up!
Seconded!
By the way...
All right, I'm done!
Look, you guys.
Well, for the time being, I'll try to talk in an inoffensive manner...
Yeah, that surely...
Dear Jim-sama, James-sama...
ONCE AGAIN ME, 2 YEARS AGO
For the time being, may I ask you your names?
Shirogane Soujyu.
Shirogane Sara.
So, what is this business of yours?
How tasteless.
Huh?
Sara-chan.
Who decorated this place?
It... It was me... What about it?
It's very tasteless.
It's so old-Manish.
Especially that reed mat.
You can only find those in public baths or in the rooms of delinquent girls these days.
Don't say stupid things.
Nowadays, people seem to do stuff like that.
Indeed, now that you mention it, I feel the same way about it.
Anyway, it's useless.
Or shall we say, it seems likely that he doesn't have a girlfriend...
Then again, he really doesn't seem to have one.
He's horrible. I'm disillusioned.
Unlike you two, with your exceptionally twin-like synchronization, my twin assistants....
This sort of place is so...
Men should be like "this is cute ," or something...
They are only alike in looks. Other than that, they are exact opposites.
I guess older people can only afford to indulge in old men's hobbies.
Even so, in these two years,
though our relationship is pretty carefree, I'm beginning to understand it more.
Phone answering duty Sa: Mon, Wed, Fri So: Tue, Thu, Sat
Here I go.
Oh yeah...
GO GO GO GO...
What, what?!
Sara-chan,
do you think this will work for the flower's soil?
SARA-CHAN!
DO YOU THINK THIS WILL WORK FOR THE FLOWER'S SOIL?
Okay!
By the way, should the wall be like this?
It's right on the mark!
BOSS!
Right! Right! OKAY!
It's right on the mark!
BOSS!
Okay! OKAY!!
I'm pouring the coffee now!
Little things started to pile up,
and our relationship began to grow a little.
One, two, three, four...
Huh?
How much sugar do you want?
...then much, much more...
The client isn't coming, is he?
This is most likely because he had some sort of really urgent business.
Such as?
Hmm...
Urgent business which far surpasses our imagination.
I see...
Say.
Hmm?
It's Sunday.
Don't you have stuff to do?
Rather than wasting time in this broken-down agency,
why don't you do stuff like going to the movies,
helping out around the house,
bumming around till late afternoon,
...or going on a date?
Well, it's fine though.
The sky is blue.
The clouds are white.
The appointment... changed to 3 pm.
Oh!
Caught is. Caught it.
Three o'clock.
Cooking duty Sa - Tue, Thu, Sat Sou - Mon, Wed, Fri
So in other worlds, as of today, we've decided to exchange roles for cooking!
That's GREAT!
First up is Sara-chan!
Yay!
Well then, everyone, please eat up.
Let's eat.
We're done eating.
Phew, I'm done, I'm done. Man, I'm stuffed.
I feel like eating pudding.
Yeah. Yeah. Well, Sara-chan's cooking is pretty good.
From now on, Sara-chan can do all the cooking.
Yes, yes.
Anyway, the client should be coming anytime now.
Isn't it our job to tidy up?
Yes. Yes.
[Hot Cake]
[Portions Eaten]
Eh?! What? There's still a lot remaining.
I'm gonna eat it, I'm gonna eat it!
Yum, Yum.
Well it's not like it's bad but...
Yeah. Yeah.
Hot! HOT! IT'S LITERALLY BURNING!
Yeah. Yeah.
Rentarou!
There, there.
It you want to cry, then cry.
Cry until your sadness ends.
And then, eat this.
GYAAAAAAAAAAAK!!
Sigh.
Another fire?
Yeah... Seems like it.
Just last week too...
Yeah...
It was also burning wildly last week...
Though I'm saying this for the sake of honor, I really didn't cause those fires.
ME, 1 WEEK AGO
It's inaccurate to use a gentle word like "fire" to describe the previous events, though.
An explosion blew my house to pieces, blew off the roof, and...
and...
still, there were things that didn't get destroyed.
I had a nostalgic dream.
ME, 5 YEARS AGO
E-Everyone!
This is not a scene from a movie!
This is reality, Tokyo's city of Futagotamagawa!
The fire is still spreading right now!
You damned idiot!
How dare you climb up on people's chimneys without permission!
Grandma!
Quick! Let's go or we won't be able to evacuate in time!
Crap!!
You alien bastard!
We're gonna get up there and blow you to smithereens!
Indeed...
Though I'm a squid, I don't know whether or not to abduct more people,
so I'll just burn this world until there is nobody left but squids!
Believe what you will, deny what you will,
no matter what, I'll make use of it. I am just going to KILL YOU!
RAGING FIRE!
The criminal is an unidentified squid.
A squid?
Yes, it certainly is a squid.
We don't really know anything other than that it's a squid.
The counterstrike forces aren't here yet.
The desperate actions of the police were futile, and the city is...
What idiots.
It... It's impossible, I said!
N-N-N-No matter how you think about it, we'll die!
16 years
By the way, this is me 5 years ago.
Contrary to my sharp appearance, I was seriously inexperienced.
Are you going to run away?
It's not about running away!
Why do we have to go and fight that squid thing?
Answer me! Just try and answer me!
Because I love it.
Huh?
Because I love this Nikotama!
Life is long...
whether you bum around in front of a convenience store, or run away with a stolen bike, or do whatever you feel like.
But, at least, you must know this:
For a man, there comes a time when he has to protect what must be protected.
At that time, what action will you take?
In a man's lifetime, there is one moment when everything will be decided.
D-Dad.
Son.
It it were you, what would you do?
If it was me...
If you were a father...
you'd do it like this!
Damn it! Are we at our wits' end?
That is...
Are you scared?
I'm fine, you damn bastard!!
I see!
This is the first time you've charmed me, my son.
In that case, I shall impart it to you now!
The Futaba Family One Hit Striking Technique!
Squid?
SQUID!
Son, I'm leaving the steering up to you!
Watch me. I'll show you want real man does!
There will be no victory for you!
In that case...
In that case I'm gonna show you my special attack!
Ouch!
That's me 5 years ago.
My ineptitude hasn't really changed since then,
but I resolutely decided to lead the life of a man,
in those moments when my heart wavered.
I'm home!
Ah, they finally came back!
YOU!
In the end, the client didn't come.
It's my fault.
I didn't say that. I didn't say that.
Oh well.
The income of the Futaba Detective Agency today sums up to zero.
And Sunday is... over.
I wonder what happened.
Oh!
UFO!!!
Outside, outside! Quickly...!
Hurry up! hurry up!
Outside, outside! Quickly! Quickly!
Oh, Nidaime!
Where are you going this late?
It's a UFO, a UFO!
To tell the truth, business was never good enough that I needed to hide assistants.
And I'm always being called "Nidiame by others."
In the end, I wasn't able to catch that fish.
Oh? What's the matter, Nidaime? You're in quite a hurry.
A UFO, a UFO!
UFO! UFO!
Huh?
Of course, there's no way a UFO would appear on such an ordinary day.
But...
Well, if I were to keep going, I could ramble on forever...
It's just that I'm sure I'd end up paying for it.
So, that's our wonderful detective business, our 'detective life".
So then, what sort of story would you like to hear tomorrow?
All's right with the world.
As expected, as expected.
Hi, this is the Futaba Detective Agency.
We are not here at the moment.
Please leave us a message with your request after the beep. Thanks!
A-Ah, excuse me!
Even though I had called you earlier, some circumstances messed up my plans for today.
I was thinking of rescheduling that appointment...
We are here.
We will be here.
The slow time is
flowing in this room.
Even if the summer days vanish,
the smiles that remain
are a chain of happiness up to this point.
Ah, the meaning of honesty,
is within the innermost depths of your heart.
Hey, the days are wonderful
in the midst of weakness and anxiety.
I won't say goodbye, Because forever
the days will be unchanged.
Surely forever.
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Futakoi Alternative "Emerald Mountain High"